Fun with the cops ;)
What will be your state of mind when suddenly the cops stop you on your way home?
The answer is simple- if you’re guilty, you die within, if you aren’t, you face them without fear. There’s another category of people who search their brains for any kind of mischeif they’d done. A kind of fear whether you’ll be blamed unnecessarily even if you’ve not made a mistake.
I fall under this category and so did I wonder a bit when a cop did stop me that day. But I immediately discovered the reason – I had forgotten to wear my helmet. My pillion rider didn’t get the reason though. Besides, we’d just meant to travel less than a kilometer- my house & my client office being so near. Till the day before I used to wear the helmet but that day somehow both of us forgot about it.
So the cop who asked me to stop sent me to another cop near the Jeep. I went there and stood next to him while he was busy writing receipts for other ‘culprits’ who broke the rules.
‘Sir’ No response. ‘Sir’
“Mm? Where is your license?’
As I was handing it over to him, my friend gestured to tell him that we just travelled less than a Km.
‘We’d just meant to travel from that point to this point (I showed him the two buildings), less than half a km’. My client office and my apartment were visible from the point we stood. But he remained oblivious to what I was saying. My friend gestured to me and whispered ‘He hasn’t heard. Tell him you actually forgot and that we were travelling such a small distance.’
‘Sir’ ‘We just travelled from that point to this point.’
‘That particular area, you see? That particular area, when you come that way, it’s very dangerous. Any vehicle can come from anyside and specially if it’s a heavy goods vehicle and if you don’t have helmet, it affects your head first, your body gets suspended and the death is certain and sudden!’
He said all this in one breath, monotonously as if he were forced to learn those words byheart that for a second I was transported to my 4th std classroom were teachers used to ask questions and kids used to vomit whatever they mugged up. The psychology is that, even if you say the same thing or ask the same question, they’ll vomit the same sentence in the same monotonous way and so I gave up on the Cop. While he was filling the receipt.
‘I need the vehicle’s paper and book.’
Well, it was my new scooter. Almost a week old, yeah a new born 🙁 . And so I didn’t have the RC book coz they said I’ll only receive it in a month’s time. During that time they’d aske d to keep the company’s brochure, the insurance papers and the book with the manual and servicing details instead of the RC book. So I took those and gave him.
In a mock childish voice, ‘They had said that, I’ll only receive those things after a month since they’ve to send it from there and so till then I was asked to keep this as a substitute.’ 😛
Like you the readers, and myself who framed the lines, he too didn’t have a clue about what I said
‘What? I want the RC book. Do you understand? RC book! Where is it?’
‘That’s what sir, they said that they will take a while, a month or so to send those things from there and so till then, since this is a new scooter I could keep these as a substitute. That’s what they said.’
Again he blinked, ‘Oh you mean to say that this is a new scooter?’
I beamed, ‘Yeah’ 😀 (As if I didn’t know to say that. Just having a bit of fun with the cops. You don’t give simple answers to questions & questioners you don’t like. Do you? ;))
‘Alright, so what is the vehicle number?’
I thought for a while. I had memorised it but since I was asked suddenly that too by a cop, I was blank. So I slowly took a dramatic step towards my pleasure while the cop stared at me, read the reg num and told him. By now my friend couldn’t control her laughter.
‘Your house name’
I began thinking again. This time I was serious. It was around four years since we had shifted from our own home to an apartment. We had a house name there but here, I’d never thought of it, what was our house name? Every house normally had a name na, we never brought the name from that house to this house 😀
‘House name… er… (he stared) house name… ayo… house doesn’t have a name… eh.. hmm’
‘Where do you stay?’ apparently irritated.
I was enjoying, you don’t get the chance to make the fool out of cops everyday. I mumbled my apartment name.
‘xxxxxxxxxxxxx apartments!!!’ I shouted this time and pointed at the arch of my apartment in front of which he was questioning me. I had told him I just had to travel so much and this was my house in the beginning itself and he’s asking the same question unnecessarily, in front of my own apartments.
‘Hm ok’ he kept writing. I kept peeping over his shoulder watching what he was writing.
‘Your name?’ I gave, he wrote and I peeped.
I, who was standing so close to him, peeping over his shoulder, stepped twice back and stared at him as if he had asked me to give him my 2 kidneys.
He began sweating (I don’t know why, but apparently my display of astonishment worked.) Apologetically, ‘Er, oh you’re not married, well it’s enough if you say your father’s name.’ I blinked and kept staring as though he had uttered such a ghastly thing.
My friend was consumed into another one of her laughing fits. This time she almost turned around trying to suppress her laughter.
‘Give your father’s name, that will do. Your father’s name is enough.’
After I gave the name, he tore off a receipt, took a hundred bucks from me.
My friend and myself left soon and needless to say, by the time we had moved, the Cop’s jeep had crossed us and fled. Probably they had other important work or maybe they didn’t have the guts, time or energy to encounter any other notorious ‘criminals’ like us.
I did give them answers to all that they asked, so he cant blame me. The prob is he never understood a thing.
It took ages for them to get the answers for silly questions. I was never in a hurry. Besides I was just before my house so I had no tension. They were the busy and important people. If he wanted to leave he had to stop questioning me. Coz he really had to wait the longest to get my house name. Just imagine 😀
And finally, he was the one who felt guilty after all. He’ll never again ask a girl her husband’s name. The cop felt guilty to have questioned me! 😀
They fled & we ran into a cafe nearby & repeated the conversations over & over again in fits of laughter.