I had cried for almost everyday that week. I am a very sensitive person and a tiny passing comment could pull me down. When such comments were passed when I was already low, it just had me moping all day. The scenario was already bad.
I was writing my CA finals the 2nd time. The results of my first attempt was bad, so bad that only 3% had passed from the whole of India. They weren’t lenient at all and that was enough reason to cool me down. But my marks weren’t good at all. I had a huge gaping gap to cover up and I feared that I would never cover that up. Why couldn’t they just tell us that they would be strict? I wouldn’t have written. I felt like I had been nipped in the bud.
Still, I somehow pulled myself up and tried to get back to my studies. Studying wasn’t the tough part. Keeping myself motivated was. The thought that I’m not going to cover all those marks up was enough to dampen my spirits. My parents, sister and friends were all supportive. There wasn’t any dearth for that. But my insides were squirming with mixed emotions.
Amidst this, due to work pressure, Mom had been behaving weirdly. Mom never does that. Of course! Rarely when she gets all worked up. But this wasn’t the time. There were some silly comments that she passed. But they hurt me greatly and I was very upset. To add to this, I was blamed for not helping my Grandmom in doing her work.
I love my Grandmom. A lot! She loves cleaning. It is a triangle love story. Of course! She loves me too. But she is kind of addicted to cleaning so much that, we can’t stop her. She wants to clean everything everyday in her own way. But she is too old to do it all by herself. Giving up isn’t her cup of tea. She is not ready to accept that she is old. I am not whining. I am stating that, that is how she feels. I have accepted her that way. But she can’t accept me when I don’t do the cleaning for her 😛 and there begins another drama.
So, that was the drama unveiling that day. I told her I would help her when I take my break but she wanted me to help her ‘when she called’. When it was all too hard to take, I began to cry. A marathon crying that was. I couldn’t stop myself.
Here is when our heroine enters the scene – My sister Rosta. We understand each other quite well and she started talking to me and consoling me. She tried to stop my tears but no! I was the source for all the rivers in South India. She tried to talk me out of my tears. But our conversation ran in loops whereby she will come back to the same point, ‘It’s alright. You have to study.”
Finally, I guess she had enough. She asked me to get up.
“No. I have to study. I just have a very few days.”
“I can see how your studies are going right now. So just get up”
“we are going to coffee always.”
“I don’t have any money.”
“I have. You just listen to me and come with me. You haven’t been out for a long time. You need a break.”
“How much do you have?”
“That is 130 Rs. we have and you can buy anything you want with that.”
We were seated in the cafe nearby. That was our favorite hangout place. We checked the menu and ordered two least cost, decent coffee. With what was remaining, we ordered French fries. We sat there and talked for a long time. I did not notice then, but I felt much happier.
It was after ordering that we realised that the amounts may not include taxes. Finally, we paid the bill and thankfully the menu price was inclusive of tax. I reached home and realised how my mood had changed since I left the place. It wasn’t hard for me to study after that. I always remember that day. My sister knew what exactly to do. She couldn’t see me upset even for a while that, even though she had so little of her saved money left, she decided to spend it all for me.
I never admit this to her, but sometimes, it is nice to see the little ones behave like grown ups and do things for us that normally we do for them. And I know she will be there with me no matter what. 🙂
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