Today our CA Final results were out. I didn’t get through. Now, don’t feel sorry for me. Failure in CA is nothing new. Every May and November, around 90% of the students attempting CA Finals don’t clear because the institute decides the percentage of students that should pass. If they fix 10% and if you fall within the top 10%, you are in. Unfortunately, many of us didn’t.
I was devastated. Obviously. But I did not give up. I will be writing again. We are made like that, the CA species. We fall down and get hurt badly, but we get up again and try again. Sometimes 3 attempts, sometimes 5 or 10 or even more. Some of them who persevere, finally make it.
For those who don’t have much idea about CA, you can read my previous posts where I have discussed some phases of CA:
100 Happy Days – Day 43
Happiness is moving forward
You must be really wondering how on Earth could I include this day among my happy days. I couldn’t imagine doing that 28 hours ago, when the results were out. The first thought that came was ‘I have no reason to be happy.’ But slowly, as the truth sank in, I became numb and when the numbness faded, I became aggressive. I wanted to do something. I had to. Sitting and looking at the blank wall did not give me any solution.
I had to start again. But I also wanted some action. I wanted a job to keep me occupied while I recoup and pull myself together. I began to prepare my writer’s resume, I started hunting for a writing job. Like a hungry, wounded lioness I banged onto the keypad and applied in I-have-no-idea-number-of places. I saved many other ads I found. I got replies from some of them. I learnt new things about writing.
At the end of the day, I realised how the failure had turned things around. If I had been sitting and moping all day, it would have made me all the more miserable. I wouldn’t have found a reason to be happy and this 100 Happy Days challenge would have ended in my misery. Do you know what encouraged me? A simple picture.
Also, a post on Scoopwhoop helped me a great deal. The final outcome was that today, I was up and moving. I still don’t know where my life is taking me. But, as long as it keeps moving, I can call it ‘Life’. 🙂
I will be alive as long as words exist and these fingers can write them.