Changing The Way We See Equality Improves Life

Is absolute equality in relationship attainable?

So tell me. Do you believe in equality? Do you believe that two things on this Earth or beyond can be absolutely equal with not even a tiny, minuscule difference?

If the answer is yes, I would like to know two things that according to you are absolutely equal (Something measurable of course!). Because my answer is No and I am open to disagreements. Let me elaborate my views on this.

Can you say for sure that two 1 Liter bottles of water are exactly 1 liter each to the last measuring unit? There would be a very slight difference for sure don’t you think? Consider the weighing blocks themselves that we rely so much on, to weigh groceries and household products. Can you for sure, say that a weighing block will weigh exactly 1 Kg to the last measuring unit? It could weigh 99.9999999999 grams or 1000.000000000000000000001 grams.

Do these weighing blocks weigh exactly as they say they do?
Do these weighing blocks weigh exactly as they say they do?

Absolute equality is a myth. There might be a one in a million chance to achieve absolute equality. But we’ll never know because we really cannot measure the decimals to their exact value. We do not know where exactly 999 grams end and 1000 grams begin. Does it end after 999.9999 or after 999.999999999? There is no end to the number of nines you put there.

You might be wondering where I am going with this. We strive to achieve equality in many ways, in many areas in our lives. And it is when we strive to achieve equality that we begin to keep scores, we strive for perfection and seek to take revenge. I’d like two discuss two areas here:

Gender equality

It is impossible for women and men to be equals. I used to believe in it once but not anymore. I wouldn’t say that one gender is superior to the other. It all depends upon people and circumstances. Among so many scenarios, I could list down a few reasons why men and women cannot be equals:

  1. This is something basic I have observed. No two men are equal. How can we expect a man and a woman to be equals?
  2. For many women, menstruation is a pain. It gets really bad for a few that it affects their performance. It is a real issue and one cannot deny it. Meanwhile, other women have it easy with barely any pains and right there, we ourselves can see differences within the same gender.
  3. Men have penis and women have vagina (I know! It is no rocket science). The organs and the related hormones, thought processes, the mind, they all work entirely differently. They derive pleasures differently. As a result they think differently. How could there be equality between two genders that have so many differences?
  4. To add to all this, the society has moulded our mindsets in a certain manner that we are all taught dos and don’ts differently. Even if this wasn’t the case, even if we were all taught to think alike, the difference in bodies and hormones suffice to disprove equality between the two genders.

Equality is a subjective word and when feminists fight for equality, they do have a point to an extent. Let’s not get into details here. That being said, one cannot claim that both the genders are equal in all respects. There is no absolute equality.

Relationships

This is the second aspect I’d like to discuss. No two people in a relationship put in equal efforts to maintain the relationship. There is always that one person who gives more. This is because as I mentioned earlier, no two people are equal. Most of the relationship issues stem from various forms of inequality:

  • A believes he/she is giving more than B, while the latter refuses to agree or acknowledge it.
  • A assumes that B needs a certain something and keeps giving lots of it, while B doesn’t even like it and refuses to respond. An element of inequality is created here as A gives so much and B feels unsatisfied.
  • A believes that it is B’s duty to give and that it is not an act worthy of acknowledgement or applause.

    Is absolute equality in relationship attainable?
    2. Is absolute equality in relationship attainable?

If you are in a relationship and face problems, you could, most of the times correlate it to a form of inequality. It need not always be a romantic relationship. In any form of human encounter, there is a certain amount of giving and taking not just in the form of things, but words, gestures etc. Whenever there is a clash or disagreement, there is an element of inequality.

Finding the point of inequality and addressing it could solve many of the issues that we face. As for the question I asked you in the beginning, I believe nothing in this universe could be exactly equal. All we can do is to reduce the inequality. Life will be easier if we strive to reduce the inequality rather than strive to achieve equality. They are two different things that give two different results and different levels of satisfaction.

So what do you think? Is it possible for two people to give in a relationship absolutely equally? Is absolute equality achievable in any scenario? I am open to more thoughts on this. 😀

Image courtesy: Weighing Blocks, Image 2

4 thoughts on “Changing The Way We See Equality Improves Life

  1. My you do have a point here; made me thin ka lot about it. Decreasing inequality is indeed a better stance to have in life than trying to be equal! Your logic is rock solid and I loved the clarity of your thought in getting this across Ranjini!

    Like

    1. I am a feminist too. I did not elaborate on that front of men and women being treated equally because the post would become super long. But yes! A woman should not be deprived of any kind of benefits just because she is a woman. My views are only against people who claim that the genders are equal, that there is no difference at all.

      Liked by 1 person

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